As I walked outside, I noticed it was a typical sunny Southern California day. Only a few clouds in the sky, simply a beautiful day. The kind when it's not too hot and you get a cool breeze every once and while. About 80 degrees, a perfect day for the beach. Instead of doing something pleasant like going to the park or beach, I was heading to my boyfriend's house to break up with him.
It wasn't because I didn't love him. God knows I do. I just didn't trust him. Besides he's going to college and I'm still in High School. I didn't want to hold him back from his college experience.
I drove in my new car. Not exactly new but new to me. My older sister Camden, gave it to me when she got a new car for completing her first year of college. She's obviously spoiled and a bit snobbish. Total opposite of me but I love her dearly.
I arrived at his house a little after 3 pm. His mother and my mom's best friend, Trina, greeted me with a warm hug.
"Hey, Hayden baby. The boys are in the backyard", she said smiling.
She looked super cute in her blue dress. Auntie Trina is the most fashionable and coolest adult I've ever met. She's fun and easy to talk to.
"Thanks, Auntie Trina", I said.
I made my way to the familiar backyard. They just landscaped, making it the hot spot to hang out this summer. Travis and Trent were throwing a football back and forth on the realistic looking faux grass.
"Hey bestie", I said to Travis.
He tossed the ball back to Trent then gave me a hug. He put his sweaty arm around my shoulder and kissed my cheek.
"You didn't come to hang out with me huh? It's always Trent. I'm glad he's leaving so I can get my best friend back", he said playfully.
"Trust me you'll have me back", I said seriously.
Trent came over and pushed Travis off of me.
"Get off my girl, man", he said to his little brother.
"Hey, babe. What's up?", he asked.
"We need to talk alone", I said looking at Travis.
"Sure thing", Trent said.
Travis gave us a knowing look and headed back into the house. Trent grabbed a water bottle and gulped it up in what seemed to be one swallow.
I was nervously picking at my gold charm bracelet that he gave me on our one year anniversary. He stared at me as I was fidgeting with it.
"What's wrong Hayden?", he asked.
"Umm... well, you are about to leave in a few weeks and I think it's best that we end things", I said faintly.
He sat down on the bench with a confused look on his face.
"What? Why Hayden? What did I do wrong?", he asked.
"Nothing. I'm 16 and still in high school. You just turned 18 and you are going to Stanford. I don't want to hold you back. I want you to enjoy college. Be a bachelor and enjoy the whole experience", I said.
"You are breaking up with me because I'm going to college?", he asked.
"Well, yes. Then I was thinking I'm too young to be in a serious relationship. I need to focus on school more anyway. When you go to college you'll find better girls than me anyway. Girls that will do what I won't", I said looking down at my feet.
I couldn't look at him. This was harder than I thought it would be.
"Wow! I can't believe you. Is this really because I want to have sex and you don't?", he asked.
I looked up at him with a scowl plastered on my face. Now I was getting upset. Why was he making this so difficult? I am breaking up with you nicely Trent. I didn't understand why he couldn't just accept it. I thought to myself.
He didn't even want to be with me anyway. All the rumors I was hearing that he's sleeping around with any girl that would give it to him. I was tired of people laughing at me and calling me stupid behind my back. Even worst, feeling bad for me. I did not want people to pity me. I wasn't weak or stupid.
"No. It's just over between us. You haven't been happy for the past 6 months. I know it's because of me. Honestly, I haven't been either. Let's just be friends again. I wish you the best in college. Call me sometimes. Anytime you want", I said more dismissively than I intended.
I was slowly taking off my bracelet, preparing to give it to him.
"I guess you can have this back", I said handing him the bracelet.
He held the bracelet in his hand looking down at it.
"I don't understand. I thought you cared about me", he said sadly.
"I do. I'm doing this because I care about your happiness. Trent, it's for the best. Let's just end on good terms. We will always be friends", I said.
"Hayden, tell me the truth. Why are you doing this? I don't want to break up with you", he pleaded.
"Trent, I told you. I'm too young. I want you to be happy and enjoy college life. I'll still go with you to the airport on your last day. I promise", I said.
His jaw clenched and his honey brown eyes cut into slits.
"Fine. Don't even think about coming to see me leave. I think you should leave", he said coldly.
Confused at his harshness, I took a step back from him. I really thought he would be relieved it was over and we would just be friends again. I was hurt how difficult he was being with me.
"Okay. I was not trying to hurt you. I just wanted to give you what you needed. You were my first boyfriend and I'll never forget what we had. I hope you still want to be my friend eventually. I wish you the best", I said.
I turned around and headed back in the house. I was trying with everything in me not to cry. I was walking toward the door when I ran straight into Travis' chest. I almost fell from the impact.
"I'm sorry", I whispered.
He steadied me as he sighed.
"What did he do?", he asked.
"Nothing. I need to go okay. I'll see you later", I said.
Somehow a tear escaped revealing my true feelings.
"Hayden, you are crying. What did he do?", he asked again.
"Nothing. It was me. I ended it. I'm sorry Travis but I have to go", I said.
I grabbed the doorknob and practically bolted to my car. I drove to the park and just sat in my car. I didn't want to go home. I didn't want to talk to anyone about what just happened. It was officially done between Trent and I. Instant regret crept through my mind. I love Trent and I didn't want to I let him go. But I needed to do this for my heart. I couldn't take how he was breaking it.
Then again, maybe I should have stayed. Endured his lies and unfaithfulness. But I couldn't take knowing he didn't love me. Besides, he was going to just cheat anyway. I couldn't take back what I did. It's over and I had a strong feeling he didn't want to see me ever again.