It is the waiting and hoping for him to return that has me in a torturous vice.
It is like the moon chasing after the sun. A circuitous cycle that is never ending. A broken heart that is barely held together by stitched threads.
My heart is bleeding and in pain, waiting for him to heal with his touch.
If I am going to lose it all, why not gamble with everything I have. I am not going to dance around the truth. I am desperate for his touch, his love, and his fulfillment of his promises. A day without him was years to me. A year without him is a lifetime.
“Who are you?” I pleaded again and my voice cracked under the overwhelming emotions. Tears welled up in my eyes.
“What do you want to hear?” He asked. “That I am him?”
I didn’t know how to respond. He gave me a sad smile.
“Things are different now.” He murmured. I felt him pulling away. I moved to take hold of his shoulder to stop him. He turned back to me.
I shook my head, “Please.”
I allowed the unbearable pain in me to lace my voice. It came out weak and tortured, pleading for relief. The woe of love bound me in its grip.
“Like the very source that makes my heart beat, it’s scent leaves behind a fragrance that I cannot forget.” He whispered, moving forward to press his forehead against mine. His eye flickered close and he took in a shaky breath. “Her eyes are my passage to nirvana. Her lips are worth more than immortality.”
My heart was pounding so loudly in my chest, threatening to escape. Everything around me spun but my eyes were focused in on him. I stopped breathing and tears clouded my vision. I blinked and they spilled down my cheeks and rolled down the side of his hands that were on my cheeks.
“Her scent is imprinted in my soul. She alone cuts and binds my heart.“He opened his eyes and a sob escaped my lips. His eyes were no longer just brown. They were tinted with gold bands and specks. I let out a small whimper of relief and pain. Frantically, I moved to cup his cheeks and pressed my lips against his.“I love you.” Were the only words that were slipping past my lips, set on replay. I uttered them over and over. One for each day he was gone, one for each beat of my heart.
He smothered my proclamation with his lips. One hand slipping to my hair. I felt him pull the silver hairpin, releasing my mass and damp hair down. I deepened the kiss, frantically needing affirmation that this was real. That he was really here. That I am not dreaming.
He shifted so I was straddling his hips. His seat leaned back to give us room. With me being on top, I took the upper hand and controlled the kiss. It was incautious and fierce but then I suddenly needed to see if he was real. I tore my lips from his. His eyes opened to look at me.
This emotion inside of me. It was almost indescribable. I felt powerless under its power. It had me soaring and my world spinning. My heart hurting yet healing. My mind screaming yet dazed.
It felt like I have waited an eternity for him and now that I have him. I am afraid to lose him. A sudden fear dampened my happiness and I needed to hear him tell me he was really here.
“Raiden,” I whispered his name.
One corner of his lip lifted and I returned his smile with one of my own. He cupped one side of my cheek and I leaned into his touch. I closed my eyes and relished in his nearness.
“I am not dreaming, am I?” I murmured.
“No, Raisneua o’myen. You are not.” He replied. “I promised you that I will always return to your side, didn’t I?”
Elation washed over me and I wrapped my arms around him, pulling him closer and inhaling his scent. His arms wrapped around my waist. Together we held each other for the longest time. Content in eliminating all the spaces between us. I closed my eyes and allowed my heart to again fall in sync with his.“You are here. You are real. I missed you.” I murmured against his neck.
“I miss you too.” He murmured into my shoulders. His arms tightening around me.
“We should get you out of those wet clothes. I do not want you to get sick.” He said and I heard the car door opened but I clung to him. When he realized I wouldn’t let him go, he laughed a little before getting out of the car with me still wrapped onto his body.
When we were out of the car, he released me and I dropped to my feet. My arms were still around his shoulders. He brushed his lips on my forehead.
He’s back but there were so many questions. I needed to know what happened. I am relieved that he is here but how did he get here.
“You have questions, I know.” He murmured before pulling back enough to look down at me. “I will answer them once you’re out of your wet clothes.”
He led me inside his condo. The living room and kitchen were connected. It had white marble flooring and ceiling to floor windows that covered the front of the condo and one side. A long spiral staircase separated the two rooms.
We walked up the steps up to the second flooring. There were two bedrooms. He led me to the one on the right. Opening the door, he walked into a walk in closet. I stepped inside and looked around.
The room didn’t have many decorations. A small glass desk sat in one corner of the room. Two nightstand tables sat on both sides of the queen size bed.
He came out with nicely folded clean clothes. Gesturing with his head he pointed to a door connected to the bedroom.
“You can use the bathroom to change.” He offered.
I nodded before accepting his change of clothes and walking to the bathroom. I removed his jacket and placed it on the counter and then stripped out of my wet clothes. I pulled on a mossy gray t-shirt that reached my thighs and black athletic shorts that had drawstrings on them to tightened them around my waist.
After I was done, I opened the door to see him sitting on the edge of his bed. He looked up when he saw me. Raiden changed into a matching mossy gray t-shirt and some black plaited sleeping pants. I glanced down at his hands and saw that he had a clean towel.
Walking over he opened the towel and started drying my hair. I couldn’t take my eyes off him. My eyes followed his eyes even though they weren’t looking at me. Gold rims. I bit my bottom lips as a surge of happiness rippled through me. This is Raiden. My Raiden.
When he was done drying my hair, he stopped his movements and glanced down at me. He caught me staring at him and a smile appeared on his face. At that moment, I think if this was indeed a dream, I would die a happy woman. It was the most beautiful thing I have seen in a long time. His smile was heart stopping beautiful.
“I am real, Anna.” He assured me once again.
I gave a little giggle of happiness. His eyes brightened at the sound and his hands dropped to his side. One hand still holding onto the towel.
“What are your questions?” He asked, placing a hand behind my back and leading me to the bed. He sat me down on the edge before walking to a white dresser and pulling out a quilted blanket. He walked over and wrapped it around me before settling down on his knees before me.
“When I came back, I woke up in my bed. My family has no recollection of where I went. You told me that they knew-”
“My father wiped it from their memories and placed them with different ones. They won’t remember a thing.” He replied.
I frowned, “But my mark-”
“Is still there.” He replied with a lopsided grin.
My frown deepened, and I pulled at my t-shirt to look down. It was still bare. I heard Raiden chuckle and glanced up to see one of his hand raised.
He waved it in the air and a blue light gleamed at his palms. It spread in little dust and moved towards my torso. Slowly, it spread and seeped into my body.
After a minute, the lights disappeared. He lifted my t-shirt from the bottom to expose my stomach. We both glanced down and there it was. His dragon. I smiled in joy before looking at him.
“How?” I asked.
“My father covered it up with a spell. Marks are permanent. They can’t disappear.” He answered me. One of his hands rested on my hip. His thumb grazed his mark and I bit the inside of my cheeks. It felt good to have him touch my skin.
“You are mine, Raisneua o’myen.” He looked back up at me.
“When I came back, I thought Grenagon was a dream. That you weren’t real but I couldn’t let go of the hope that you were.” I told him. “Why did you lie to me?”
His smile slipped and the light in his eyes died a little.
“When I came back, you were engaged, Anna. I thought you had moved on. I was going to return back to Grenagon but I couldn’t let you go. So, I stayed. If I couldn’t be by your side at least I could make you happy by making your dreams come true. I saw how he treated you. I know he loves you. I started to think that you were probably better off without me.”
“But I don’t love him.” I shook my head.
“I know that now.” He gave me a sad smile. “But I know how important it is for you to accept this marriage.”
I shook my head hard and dropped to my knees next to him.
“You won’t leave me?” I took hold of his hands.
He pulled me into his lap and nuzzled my neck. His lips brushing lightly over my sensitive skin. He deeply inhaled and his arms tightened around me.
“As long as you still love me, I will never leave you. I will never let you go.” He whispered.
“You have no idea how much I missed you. I felt like my world will never be filled with sunlight again. Everything around me brought me no happiness. When I first saw you...” An ache stirred in my chest. “I felt lost.”
“I’m sorry.” He murmured before lifting his head. His eyes dropping to my lips.
“If it makes you feel any better when I saw you in the hotel that day it took everything in me not to rip you from his arms and take you away. When you looked like you had seen a ghost and ran, my will broke and I went after you. A knife to the heart would have been easier than to see you hurt like that.” He admitted.
There were still so many questions, but they will have to wait till later. Right now, I wanted to make up for the year that we were apart. I needed him desperately. Turning in his lap, I moved to straddle him. His hands moved to settle on my hips. His eyes dropping to my lips again. Cupping his cheeks, I captured his lips in my own.
So now we know! Yay! Next chapter will be about Raiden’s time in Grenagon. Sorry, I ended with a major cliff hanger but I made it up to you guys by updating quicker.
Side note: Do we want details on their “make up time” heated session? Or no?