Finding Reason

By SashaSecret All Rights Reserved ©

Fantasy / Romance

Chapter 35

The imperial concubine was dragged out of the hall, screaming and shouting incoherent words.

Ming-hua snickered under his breath. He felt immense satisfaction seeing her disheveled appearance and the way she screamed and wept like a banshee.

Despite the commotion and heart wrenching cries, the emperor simply swirled the cup in his hands as he observed the injuries marring his body. His dark eyes flashed with anger.

“Leave, all of you, except the boy” his eyes narrowed before he began tapping on the armrest.

Everyone quickly scrambled out of the room, leaving it silent and empty besides the two of them.

Silence engulfed them, before Longwei parted his sexy lips, his dark eyes narrowed on his face in deep thought.

“You like men?” His deep voice drawled out.

Ming-hua narrowed his eyes and raised his brow, “Since when were you curious?”

His jaw clenched, his deep eyes narrowed with impatience “We are asking you a simple question.”

“Well if you haven’t noticed, I’m bleeding, injured and tired. Do you really have to ask this now?” Ming-hua languidly raised his brows, his silver eyes flashing with anger.

The emperor’s eyes flashed with guilt before he stood up elegantly, placed his wine cup down and walked towards the battered boy.

His robe glided with each elegant step. Their current appearances like heaven and earth.

Deep dark eyes bore into silver ones, as if speaking without words. The air became tense, as if the unspoken feelings urged to rage out.

Ming-hua was about to open his mouth once more, before he felt a warm hand caress his cheek. He froze and became rigid.


The emperor leaned down, his silky black hair gliding off his robes, caressing Ming-hua’s cheeks. His red sinful lips pursed as his eyes roamed the battered and bloody figure, before they flashed with disapproval and anger before settling on his steely silver eyes.

Minghua gazed up into the dark, unfathomable ones. As he took in the warmth on his cheek.

Warm breath caressed his face, sending shivers down his spine. He was engulfed with the familiar alluring scent of vanilla and spice, that calmed him and made him feel at home. It wafted through his nose, making him forget the bleeding injuries on his body.

He was exhausted, both mentally and physically, he felt as if he was once again at home, with the person he loved as he cherished the comforting warmth and his eyes slightly trembled before they slowly glided shut.

“Come, we will take care of you” the low baritone deep voice echod through the hall.

Ming-hua was momentarily stunned, his silver eyes flew open and widened slightly as his lips parted.

Before he was able to say something, he was picked up and put against a strong chest.

Longwei carried him in his arms, gently, as if treating a treasure and elegantly walked towards his palace.

He felt at peace with him in his arms, as if he had regained something he had lost and always longed for, he was unable to suppress the warmth and joy that grew in his heart as he gazed down at the ethereal male in his arms who seemed to be almost lulled to sleep.

A chuckle rumbled through his chest at the adorable sight, before he once again spotted the numerous injuries marring his body.

He hated it. He hated that he had allowed so many people to hurt such an innocent person. Why did he want to hurt this person in the first place anyway? He knew very well what it felt like to be ridiculed and treated like trash, so why did he wish it upon the man in his arms?

Regret and guilt swirled in his chest as he thought of the numerous times he had hurt him. His grip on the fragile body tightened, as if afraid he would disappear. The warmth from the young male seemed to calm his raging emotions and his breathing steadied.

Ming-hua listened to the strong, steady heartbeat as he basked himself in the familiar warmth and tried to forget the tragic reality, just for a moment, is all he wanted, before the person carrying him would once again become cold and cruel. Before he would once again share his warmth with his numerous concubines and become the emperor.

His eyes slowly closed, as he felt the cold night air hit his skin, yet it did not affect him or make him shudder, as the warmth of the person carrying him kept him warm.

The sky became dark, as the shadows of the trees engulfed the garden. The moon shone down, gracing the garden with its glow.

2 figures walked amidst the chilly night air, both basking in the others embrace, almost like a story of eternal love, yet if one looked closely they would see the tears that dripped down the battered and bloodied males cheeks as he smiled, as if savoring the warmth for the very last time, painting a bittersweet and tragic image of love.

Ace, if I fall asleep, don’t wake me up


Ming-hua’s eyes opened, as he languidly raised his small palms, rubbing away the sleep from his eyes. He yawned, stretching like a kitten, before he realized he was not on his bed.

The bed below him was the most luxurious he had ever seen. The black and golden silk caressed his skin, the bed engulfing his form in a warm embrace. The room around him could be large enough to fit an entire mansion, its designs elegant and intimidating, black and gold, making one feel pressured.

He hadn’t noticed someone beside him on the bed, until he heard a low amused chuckle.

His head snapped towards the sound, and he took in the sight of the emperor, languidly and lazily propped up on his elbow, his chin resting on his hand.

His robes were parted and ruffled, exposing his god-like physique. His black silk like hair scattered across his body and robes, falling on the pillows.

To say he was stunned would be an understatement. The person before him had treated him so gently, even though before he had allowed him to experience endless ridicule and pain. It was almost as if he had two side to him.

Ming-hua’s brows furrowed as his silver eyes flashed with confusion. He resembled a confused kitten, his eyes still slightly groggy and red from sleep.

Looking down at his state, the wounds on his body no longer hurt and were bandaged. He raised his head once again and bore his confused gaze into the emperor’s form.

Longwei’s blood red enticing lips quirked up, amused at his reaction, he seemed to be confused, and so adorable, just like a...kitten.

He hummed in satisfaction of the name, it seemed to suit him well for some reason.

Bringing his hand up, he glided it across his soft cheek, sucking up the warmth and softness, as he narrowed his deep dark phoenix eyes in satisfaction.

“You will participate in the consort selection in two weeks. That is the only way for you to continue here if you do not want to be a servant.” his deep voice flowed like silk.

He continued to stroke his cheek, as his eyes bored into the silver ones.

“If you manage to win, We will grant you any wish, You will become Ours”

A silence engulfed the grand room as Ming-hua expressionless eyes stared into his dark eyes.

After a few minutes of silence, he parted his lips

“How will you be so sure that I won’t just leave after winning the competition?” He smiled and propped his chin on his hand, raising his eyebrow.

“Do you believe I will stay?” Ming-hua chuckled humorlessly

“Do you believe I will stay and share someone with other women?”

“Do you think I would share a man I care about with another woman? No.. thousands of woman?” His eyes seemed to darken as he suppressed the rabid beast swirling within him.

Longwei’s hand gently caressing his cheek froze and his eyes widened. He parted his sinful lips to say something, but he wasn’t able to. If the male spoke so simply of leaving him, then does that mean he still has someone he loves?

He had always thought that the young male had someone that he loved, he could see the sadness and love in his eyes when he would sometimes drift off into his own memories.

Who was it? There was someone that he loved? Does he still love him? The thoughts made his chest burn even more with a whirlwind of emotions. If he had treated him better... would he have also shown him that loving expression? that beautiful warm smile?

“Who is it... who is the one that you love?” His face was overcome with darkness. His eyes darkening as his jaw clenched. The words floating out of his lips with a hint of vulnerability.

As if jolted into his memories, Ming-hua’s silver orbs became clouded

Remembering those beautiful warm golden eyes caused a pain to engulf his heart.

He chuckled, as his lips rose into a sad smile and his eyes tinged red as the stabbing pain in his heart intensified.

“The man you will never be.”

A week passed, and they were becoming closer. Longwei occasionally came to the garden to listen to him playing his flute under the cherry blossom tree.

He was unable to help himself, like a moth to a flame, even though he knew that he was waking up his cold, dead heart he was unable to resist.

The moon shone down on his elegant, upright and dominating form as he once again stood and watched him, as the sad and tragic melody played on repeat. After he had bared with it for so long he was unable to simply stand by and watch those tears fall.

He approached him elegantly, his hair scattered in the wind and his eyes narrowed with guilt and love. He stood before him, having an internal battle, before his love for the male won, and he bent down to gently wipe away his tears.

Ming-hua’s eyes jolted opened and he stared at the emperor in shock.


The flute in his hand softly landed on the grass.

His melody coming to a stop, as they both gazed into each other’s eyes, entrapped in the endless depths, unable to escape.

The night was silent, the wind and the ruffling of trees the only sound as they watched each other.

Longwei raised his flawless palm, laying it against the warm and wet cheek. “Forgive Us.” His voice unusually tense and low, as if restraining the guilt.

Ming-hua instinctively leaned into his palm, nuzzling his cheek against it, unable to help himself as he took in the warmth that protected him from the night chill.

He kept his eyes closed. The warm breath caressing his face seemed to come closer and the alluring scent became stronger.

As he was immersed in the comforting warmth, he felt something warm and smooth lightly touch his forehead. Heat seemed to emerge from the gentle touch.

Ming-hua was unable to believe what was happening, deep inside his heart was a fear, that if he opened his eyes, maybe the warmth he was experiencing was all just his imagination, so he simply sat there, his eyes closed, and allowed the warm lips to linger on his forehead. Begging it to last for eternity, begging the warmth to stay, and comfort him forever.

After some time, the warmth seemed to depart, and he could once again feel the cold breeze.

Fluttering his eyes open, he focused his unsteady silver orbs on the emperors form before him and he took in the warmth that seemed to emerge from his usually cold and dark eyes.

His heart that had been so, so cold and engulfed in agony seemed to have a spark of warmth and joy, as if finding hope and light in a dark nightmare. Ming-hua’s hand fisted the grass beneath him, as he wished the moment could last forever, that those warm eyes he wished for would always belong to him.

They stared into each other’s eyes. The emperor’s eyes warm and loving as he looked down at him.

Longwei no longer wanted to deny his feelings. He no longer wanted to see him suffer. He no longer wanted to see those enchanting eyes shed tears under the moon light. Yet he was still unable to tell him how he felt, he was still unable to tell him he felt for him like none before.

Ming-hua was still astonished.

The warmth he finally wished for finally seemed to show in those eyes. It was real, not a figment of his imagination. Ming-hua was unable to stop the stinging in his eyes so he simply looked down, lowering his gaze before he picked up his flute and silently left.

Longwei watched him walk away, his royal dragon robes and his long black hair fluttering in the wind as he took in that slender form that seemed so strong and unrelenting, yet undeniably tragic and lonely.

His raised his hand and gripped his chest, as the words that occupied and haunted his mind seemed to echo in the wind, engulfing his chest in agony.

“The man you will never be”

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