Chapter Twenty: Final Confessions
Many years later, I was still alone, pining for Kay. I had no idea how her relationship with Richard was going, but I didn’t want Carl around him anymore.
The day was Friday, and Darren was coming to pick Carl up to spend the weekend with him. I was fine with it. While I waited, my phone rang. It was Richard. At this point we had been together for about four years. He was sexy, attentive, generous, and his love making was pretty awesome. I cared a great deal for him, but even after all this time, Darren was still there. Well, of course he was still there. We had a child together. But that is not what I mean. He cheated on me, one time. Well, not one time, several times, but one video gave me all that evidence in one sitting. It was a little hard to swallow, so I broke off with him. Every time I saw him, I couldn’t help wondering what would have been. Did I still love him? No. Impossible. It had been well over six years. There was no way that I still held a quiet flame for him. The fire had long burned out.
Richard was my future. Richard was well, Richard. As long as things were going well with him, I was going to stay with him.
“Since Carl will be out of school for a week, I thought we should go out of town,” Richard said.
I was excited. “Really? Where will we go?”
It was winter in New York. Brutally cold, but we hadn’t seen much snow.
“Perhaps, Hollywood. I have some friends working on a movie right now. It will do Carl some good to get away from this cold weather for a while. Perhaps you too.”
I was excited about the thought of getting away from the city. Since I no longer had a job that allowed me to travel, I kinda missed it. It would be good to get out of town for a few days. The warm sun in sinful Los Angeles was calling me.
“That sounds wonderful, Richard, but I will have to clear it with Darren first.” It left my mouth, and I hated that I even had to say it. I should be able to take my son and go where I pleased. However, wealthy Darren Smith was still taking care of me and my son. Well, now, more his son than me. He would have a fit if I left the state with Carl.
“I understand,” Richard replied. “Let me know, and I will get everything set up.”
“I will Richard. I will talk to you later.”
I hung up the phone and my stomach growled. I better go get lunch started.
Before I could get to the kitchen, a small voice came from behind.
“Mommy?” It was Carl.
I turned around to find him still in his pajamas. “Carl Jacobs,” I exclaimed. “Why aren’t you dressed yet?”
I was too. “Well your daddy is coming to pick you up for the weekend in a few minutes.”
He cheered loudly. “Brothers! Brothers! Brothers! Brothers!”
His joy at seeing Walter and Tevin made me smile, but I wondered how he felt about his dad. “Aren’t you excited to see your daddy?”
Carl shrugged. “He’s alright. But Tevin and Walter are much more fun.”
I giggled. Out of the mouth of babes. “Perhaps. Go on baby get dressed.”
“Okay mommy!” He turned on the ball of his foot. “Tevin! Walter! Tevin! Walter!” he chanted down the hall. I couldn’t help but laugh.
On my way to the kitchen, the doorbell rang. I looked at my watch. He’s a little early. I changed course and went to the front door. Opening it, I found the insanely tall, wickedly handsome, Darren Smith.
“Hello Darren.” I backed away and let him in the door.
“Hello Kay. Is Carl ready?”
“Almost. He’s getting dressed now.”
The silence between us was almost deafening. I remembered that a few years ago we could actually talk to each other. Time changed us.
Darren looked at me and out of the blue asked, “So, how is Richard?”
“Why?” I asked glaring at him. “You really don’t want to know.”
He nodded. “You’re right. I was just being nosy.”
I was feeling confident. “Actually, he wants to take Carl and me to California.”
There were no words. Darren shook his head for what seemed like an eternity. “Absolutely not. You are lucky that I even allow him around Carl at all.”
Selfish ass! “You are thinking of your business deal before your son, as usual.”
“Richard Harrison Sr. is worth a huge amount of money, Kay…” Business, just as I thought. Suddenly he backtracked. Darren sighed loudly. “Be glad that I am, or he would be living with me, just like Tevin.”
I knew what Darren did to Celiene. With all his money, she didn’t have a chance. Darren stole her baby from her. Yes, she has the right to see Tevin, and Darren doesn’t object, but his wealth allowed the judge to do things that were in the best interest of Tevin. I didn’t want that to happen to me.
“Would you take him from me?” I asked in fear.
Darren didn’t hesitate. “You’re damn right I would. I love him just like I still love you.”
What the hell did he just say? “Excuse me? What?” What Alani told me was true. I didn’t want to believe it.
“You heard me.”
This was a game. He didn’t mean what he said. It had been years for goodness sake. I wasn’t having it. “You are not going to come in here and try to break my heart again, Darren Smith!” I yelled. I didn’t mean to yell. Or did I?
He crossed his arms in front of him and gave me a stare that should have killed me. “We have known each other forever. Does it always have to be about you, Kay? What about me and my feelings? I have loved you for years.”
He said it again and my feelings, already exposed, jumped onto my sleeve. “It’s not all my fault that we aren’t together, Darren! Don’t put that on me!”
He pointed in my face. “Most of it is your fault! I offered myself to you many times, yet you refused! I begged you to take me back after my selfish cheating, and yet you still said no, so yes, it is your fault Kay!”
“Daddy, why are you yelling at mommy?” Our son walked in on our argument. I never wanted Carl to know that his parents didn’t get along sometimes. I had nothing to say. Darren took care of it.
“Oh kiddo, nothing you need to worry about. Grownups do that sometimes.”
I watched as the anger he had for me melt away, and the tenderness he had for his son just take him over.
“Are you mad at mommy?” Carl asked.
“No, kiddo. Not at all. Are you ready to go?”
Carl quickly forgot about Darren and me arguing. He went into his happy chant. “Tevin! Walter! Tevin! Walter!”
Darren laughed, as did I. We watched our five-year-old get excited about hanging out with his brothers.
“Go get in the car,” Darren said. “I’ll be right out.”
Carl walked out of the door, leaving it open. That was Darren’s chance to reiterate what he told me before. “You heard me correctly. I still love you, and I don’t know if I will ever stop. So, figure it out Kay. When you do, we will both be happy. I’ll see you Sunday night.”
He turned and walked out of the door, closing it behind him. I walked to my front window and watched him get into the car with our son.
The black BMW backed out of my driveway and drove away. How in the hell can he still love me after all this time? I mused.
Later that night, I had a date with Richard. His son, Richard Jr., was running for city council. Everyone who was everyone was invited to the announcement party. I wore my pink evening gown that hugged my curves and had plenty of sequins. It was a gorgeous gown. Richard picked it out and bought it for me.
Once I showered, did my hair and make-up, it was almost time to go. I pulled out my shoes and put them on. Going to the mirror for one last look, the doorbell rang.
I went to the door and opened it. There was handsome Richard standing there in his tux clad with bow tie, and slicked back hair. My god he was handsome.
He kissed me on my cheek. “You look fantastic! I am so happy you decided to go with me tonight.”
I grinned. “I’m glad you asked. It has been a while since we have gone to a fancy affair.”
“I know,” Richard agreed. “It’s not every day that your son is nominated for city council.”
Thinking of my own son, I giggled. “I have a long time to wait for that.”
Suddenly he got serious on me. “Kay you have no idea how happy you have made me over the last few years.”
I smiled nervously. “With the way you have been doting on me these last few weeks, I have an idea.”
“Well there is something we must discuss after the party tonight. I think it will make us both very happy.”
He moved in, gently stroked my cheek, and kissed me. I had no idea what was going on in his head, but I was just a bit nervous to find out exactly what it was.
The party was at the Mayor’s mansion. It was an upscale private affair, by invite only. Richard did this to ensure that his son was going to get the right support during his campaign. He intended for his son to win his district.
We walked into the opulent grand ballroom, and everyone who was anyone was there. Celebrities, local and well known, were in the room. I think I even saw Johnny Depp. Perhaps not, but maybe. The vibe was a good one, and I looked to have a really good time.
Richard put his hand on the small of my back as we stood looking around the room. “Now this is a party!”
I smiled and agreed. “This is a very swanky affair indeed!”
He pointed across the room and said, “Oh look there is my son. Mind if I go say hello?”
I shook my head. “Go right ahead. I’ll be right here.” A tray full of champagne passed by, and I took a glass. It was really good. As I stood sipping my drink, who should approach, but Alani; looking quite fabulous by the way.
“Hey girlfriend!” She exclaimed loudly.
“Hey, Alani, how are you?”
She shrugged her shoulders. “I’m pretty excited. Richard Jr. proposed to me last night.”
I was excited for her. “Oh my god! That’s so awesome! It’s about time.”
“He said if he’s going to win, he has to have a wife.”
I took another sip of my drink. “I would agree.”
She looked back at father and son. “So how are things going for you two?” She asked in reference to me and Richard Sr.
“He says he wants to talk to me after the party. I think he’s going to propose.”
Her mouth fell open. “You must be kidding me! That would be so cool! We could do a double wedding!”
I shook my head. “There’s just one little problem. Darren told me he still loved me.”
Alani shrugged. “Of course, he does. You are the mother of his oldest son.”
I shook my head and thought of the look on Darren’s face when he left my house. “No, I think it was more than that. I think he really still loves me.”
“Kay, that’s impossible,” she said as a look of doubt washed over her face. “You haven’t been with him in years.”
“I know. It was a little weird hearing that from him.”
“So, what are you gonna do?”
“Girl, please. Nothing. I don’t believe him.” The statement that left my mouth was a lie. I just didn’t want to admit to myself that he still had feelings for me.
Alani crossed her arms. “Kay, I have never known him to lie about anything. Perhaps you should believe him.”
I rolled my eyes. “Honestly, Alani. I have no idea if I should believe him or not.”
The party was fun. As it turns out, the man I thought was Johnny Depp actually was! I got to meet him, and it was cool. I had forgotten that Richard had Hollywood connections. That would explain why there were so many celebrities at the party. After the party was over, I ended up back at his place. Over the years, that wasn’t uncommon.
“Are you sure you don’t want to go home?” Richard asked.
“No sweetie. I can stay the weekend with you. I have to be home Sunday morning.”
“Good. I wanted to talk to you about something important.”
“What is it?”
“You have been my companion for many years. You have a young son, and I want to give him something. I want to start a trust for him. He will share Harrison Industries with my son.”
I was blown away. “Are you serious? That is so amazing! Thank you!”
“You are so welcome, Kay.”
There was an awkward silence between us after that which was quite unusual. He filled that silence with a passionate kiss. After all this time he knew how to get my attention. Richard was handsome, gentle, and very respectful of me. Oddly enough after all this time, I cared deeply for him, but I wasn’t sure if I loved him.
That kiss landed me in his bed underneath him breathing heavily and writhing with pleasure. At fifty-seven years old, he knew how to please a woman in bed, and I’m glad he did. I couldn’t get enough of his love making. I always wanted him to touch me. He was a slow and powerful lover. Darren was a bit rough in bed sometimes, but that was understandable because of the way we once felt for each other. Jacob raped me. Ugh. Don’t want to think about him. Richard Harrison Sr. was good for me. Just like Darren used to be.
The following day, Richard woke me from my sleep, made love to me in the shower, and took me shopping for some new dresses. I bought what I thought would appeal to him. He approved of everything I tried on and bought it all for me. I was happy.
A few hours later, we were again at a restaurant I had never eaten at before. I wore one of the dresses he bought for me earlier in the day. He approved.
“You look absolutely stunning tonight Kay.”
I smiled widely. “Why thank you, darling.”
He looked away from me for a moment and took a deep breath. Something was coming, and whatever it was, was huge.
“Kay, I brought you out tonight, so I could talk to you about a few things. You are the first woman that I seriously dated since my wife passed. I know I have never told you how I feel, but I think you already know.”
Of course, I knew, but I pretended not to know. “Not really. Why don’t you tell me?”
The smile on his face was half. It was like he was suddenly shy. To see him like that was endearing. “I am and have been in love with you for a very long time. I love your son as well. I realize that I’m a bit old, but I was wondering...”
Oh shit he’s gonna do it, I thought. Panic set in for some unknown reason. “Wondering what?” I asked.
“I was wondering if you would do me the honor of being my wife.”
Shit! What was I going to say? “Richard, that’s very sweet, but...”
“Wait Kay,” he said stopping me. “Don’t answer yet. Please think about it.”
My heart was beating a thousand times a minute. I took a drink of my wine and smiled gently. “Richard, this is such a surprise.”
“Please Kay. Don’t answer me tonight. I will give you plenty of time.”
I breathed a sigh of relief, but still had no idea what I was going to tell him. “Thank you, Richard.”
The following day, I called Melissa. As it turns out, Celiene and Alani were at her place. She invited me over, and I of course, went to hang out with my girls. I had something to run by them. I hoped that they would be able to help me with my problem.
When I arrived, I joined them in the living room and just sat there. I must have had a pained look on my face. Melissa noticed right away. She knew something was wrong with me.
“Alright Kay, what the hell is going on?” Melissa asked.
I sighed thinking of the night before. “You won’t believe it.”
Celiene smirked. “Come on woman, out with it.”
I closed my eyes and I took another deep breath. I just didn’t know how to say it.
“Come on, Kay. We’re all here, just tell us,” Alani chimed.
“Richard asked me to marry him last night,” I blurted.
All three of them gasped at once. “That’s fantastic!” Melissa said, extremely excited.
I shrugged. “Is it?”
“Of course it is,” Celiene replied. “Then you will be a rich wife like Melissa and I.”
“Oh! And me too. Don’t forget about me. I’m gonna be a rich wife too.”
I laughed at Alani as she reminded me of a child trying to fit in with the cool kids.
Melissa looked over at her and rolled her eyes. “Yes, Alani of course. We got the text message. But Kay honey, why aren’t you happy?”
I couldn’t look at her. I couldn’t look at any of them. “I don’t think I love him. I mean he’s been really good to me, but…”
“Oh my God,” Celiene interrupted. “You can’t possibly still be in love with Dude.”
I shook my head. “Heavens no. Maybe I’m just afraid to get too close. After both Jacob and Darren, I don’t know.”
My three friends stared at me in silence. I’m not sure what they were thinking, but I still needed their opinion.
“Marry him, Kay. I think we are all ready to see you happy,” Celiene stated. Alani and Melissa agreed.
“Do you really think I should?” I asked. They all nodded with huge grins on their faces. I smiled back. “Okay. I’ll do it!”
I made my way back to Richard’s place. On the long drive back, all I could think about was how to tell Darren. Why did that matter? He is my son’s father, I mused. He has to know.
I pulled up in the driveway and went into the house. Walking into the living room, Richard was making a drink for himself. I walked over to him and smiled.
He kissed me on the cheek. “Hello beautiful. Where have you been?”
“I went into the city to have lunch with my girlfriends.”
“Did you have a good time?” He asked sipping his scotch.
“I did.” I paused for a long time and smiled widely. “Richard, I will marry you.”
He grinned widely, put his hand on the nape of my neck, and stroked my cheek gently. “Thank you, Kay. I love you.”
“I love you, too.” Then he kissed me.
The next day was Sunday. I went home that morning to prepare for Carl to come home. Around noon, the door burst open, and in came my rambunctious little boy.
“Hey Mommy!” He ran to me and gave me a hug.
“Did you have fun this weekend baby?”
“I did! Daddy took us to Bonkerz and we played laser tag and had pizza!” He was very excited about his weekend.
I giggled. “Did you win?”
“That’s wonderful son. I’m glad you had fun. Go to your room now. I need to talk to your father.”
Carl turned and hugged Darren. “Bye daddy.”
“Bye son. I will talk to you later.”
Carl ran to his room, and I watched him as he did. It gave me time to prepare. Time to tell Darren about…well, you know.
I didn’t hesitate. I turned to face him and just blurted out, “I’m getting married.”
The look on his face was shock at first then it quickly turned to anger. “To who? Richard Harrison?”
I nodded. “Yes. He loves me.”
“I love you, too.”
I rolled my eyes. I was tired of this game. “If you loved me, you wouldn’t have cheated.”
My guess Darren was tired of it as well. He took a deep breath, not wanting to argue with me about our rocky past. Then he simply said, “Good luck, Kay. You’re gonna need it.”
He turned on the ball of his foot, went to the door, opened it, and slammed it behind him. The next thing I heard was his engine starting, and squealing tires. Yeah, he was pissed.