Saffhira

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Nice Start

From what I read, the story does have an interesting plot. The beginning was a little confusing on where it all fit, and it seemed a little abrupt at how all the characters met.

As readers, we seem to know a little more about the other characters than the main guy. It's not clear who he is, though that could be the whole premise, in which case it leaves the reader interested to learn.

The style of writing is different, as well as in the narration and introduction of everyone. It was a nice read altogether, and I'd be interested to know where it goes from here.

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Absolutely beautiful work

I cannot rave about this book enough!

The emotions evoked from the characters translated so well to the reader. The main characters' naivety about her world is always at the forefront, and this allows us to learn as she does. We follow her struggles and victories, her pain and sorrows, and the small smiles she gets in her life. This was such a raw and powerful story that gave us a glimpse into your version of the Greek gods and the hows and whys of their lives.

Truly a wonderful piece of work.

-Author of Hollow's Charge

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An enjoyable beginning

I was hesitant at first by the two different points of view in every chapter, but I've come to like the conversational tone that opens them. The descriptions are short, succinct, and get to the point to bring you a clear picture of the places and characters in them. It is fast-paced, and the reader needs to really pay attention to the names of people and gangs thrown out there to keep everyone in place.

There were some grammar issues, words that needed to be capitalized and some that were missing letters. There was also some repetition when it came to the assassin's name that could be adjusted as well.

I think as a package, this book has great potential. It's intriguing and gripping in all the right parts.

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A great sequel for Emily Tual

The second book in this series goes into greater detail behind the motivation of the Black Hand and why Emily is so important. It's interesting that there comes int light yet another who could have taken Emily's place, and so the reader is left wondering what the author would do with this new character.

There were still similar issues in this book as there were in the last. I would recommend the author look into how to punctuate conversations. There were some missing words here and there, and also some parts where ideas clashed as to which word was the right one to put.

I liked the detail we got in this book, and the pace was kept throughout the entirety, I'm looking forward to reading the next book.

-Author of Hollow's Charge

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An intriguing start

From this one chapter, there's no true way to tell where this story is going, though we get a hint of something at the end that piques the curiosity. I can't comment much on the plot since there isn't much to go on at this stage, but it is a promising start.

The blurb itself was a bit redundant with the opening phrase "Among the planets." Perhaps running some of these sentences together or even eliminating a few would make for a better hook for readers. There were some grammar issues and places where names and titles could be capitalized, but these are easy fixes.

I liked much of the description. We get a sense of people and what the main character sees and experiences.

Once there are more chapters out, this has the potential to be an enjoyable read.

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Needs some fleshing

There's a good plot here that could be played with a little. I agree with others who have said that there is a whole host of repetition, grammar and punctuation need to be worked on, and that only describing someone as "Mr. Tual" or "The man with the German accent" can make your reader's eyes cross a little.

For grammar, there were misspelled or misplaced words, but the biggest one for me is that every time you write in quotes, you use a comma inside the quotes before identifying the speaker, unless it's a question.

Example. "I was asking how you were," Mandy said.
VS.
"How are you?" Mandy asked.
When a quote is followed by he/she/it, they do not need to be capitalized.

Fleshing out your descriptions, working on grammar/punctuation, and learning when and where to reveal your bad guys and/or plot twists will improve this dramatically.

I wish you luck on this and other ventures.

-Author of Hollow's Charge

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Interesting Concept

The descriptions of the characters and places were OK in that you could tell what was being talked about, and each character had their own personality to set them apart. I had a feeling before the explanation at the end that this was based off and/or inspired by anime.

The plot was sort of all over the place. The beginning was a little slow and because of the long chapters, I felt like a needed a break between each of them before I continued. If these were shortened, I believe it would help ease the flow for the readers and make them want to go to the next chapter right away.

Another thing was I wasn't sure this could even be considered a fantasy until the arrival of the faeries. Without them, this could be considered an action/sci fi book with all its bionic and warring content.

The love triangle was an interesting touch, but switching back and forth between those struggles and the random missions the main character was sent on could get confusing and a little description heavy.

There were some missing words I found here and there, and greater emphasis could be placed on grammar and punctuation, however these are easy fixes.

All in all, it wasn't a bad start. I couldn't give it higher than three stars because of the confusion I felt and the long chapters. I do hope this feedback helps in the future and I wish the best for the author!

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Great Ride!

This was a great book from beginning to end. So many characters can be overwhelming at first, but stick with it and you're able to work out who's who. The author did well with drip-feeding info and surprising me with twists I didn't guess. The ending was fulfilling and didn't leave anything hanging.

The description and detail was enthralling in this, and there was no doubt as to who or what was being discussed.

I highly recommend this book to anyone wanting a thriller that will leave you guessing till the very end.

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Enjoyable read

I liked the way emotions were captured in this book. There were vivid descriptions of everything, especially the dreams. The ending brought a nice twist that nevertheless left it bittersweet.

There were some issues with misspellings and grammar, but these did not seem to distract much from the book. The writing style was clear, and the dialogue believable.

Overall, I enjoyed this book and the interesting way it all turned out.

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Great mystery!

This was very well done. I thought I had an inkling as to the culprit a few times, but there was always something that deterred me at the last minute. The ending was completely unexpected, which made it great and yet bittersweet at the same time.

I enjoyed it overall. There's some improvement needed with grammar and missing words, but these are easily fixed.

I would definitely recommend this to mystery lovers!

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There's a good plot here.

I like the plot. It has elements that are a bit different than traditional stories in that genre.

It was fast-paced, but I think it was a bit too fast. There were times when some description was there and when more was needed.

The grammar needs some work, though spelling was good throughout. There are lots of run-on sentences and missing commas that would help slow down the narrative and let the reader catch up with all the changes.

Overall, this is a good start, and with a bit of work, this can turn into an excellent book.

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Great mystery!

I enjoyed this work from beginning to end! Every chapter gave us a nugget more to the mystery to keep us reading. The imagery when characters are describing their thoughts, feelings, and surroundings were done in a way I had never thought of, and that opened up a brand new way of writing I have never experienced.

Great plot, engaging characters, and witty, fascinating descriptors. I'm so glad I agreed to read it!

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Engaing Concept

I like the idea behind this: It definitely has the potential to be a great story. I don't get too much of a first impression of the main character because it is so short right now, but the readers do get a small sense of who they're dealing with.

Grammar and punctuation needs work, but that is always something that can be fixed. It would be worthless without a good plot to accompany it, which is not something this author needs to worry about.

The conversational tone of this story is interesting. It's not necessarily my favorite, but it isn't really a big turn off for me either.

Overall, it was a nice start and has great potential to become more.

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Good Plot

I enjoyed the plot of this. There were dynamic characters and it was funny and entertaining. The romance is taken slow and given some time to develop, and the personalities of the characters throughout this process is one of mutual respect, which I find refreshing in romance.

There are many grammatical and punctuation issues I noticed. It definitely would do the author some good to have an editor go over this and polish the product so nothing gets lost for people who tend to focus on any errors they may find.

Overall, it was a very interesting read and is a nice change from the everyday supernatural.

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