| Figures |
“YOU DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND THE SITUATION SO SHUT YOUR FRIGGIN TRAP!!!!”
Smirking, “Nope.” Let me backtrack to a couple of minutes ago. I was having a conversation with Ezzy’s oh-so-lovely boyfriend. We got into an argument about why polar bears are the color white versus why they are transparent. The argument started to get a little heated, so me being stupid, I aggressively grab his t-shirt, considering I’m very annoyed, and pull us both into the janitor’s closet. I promise the light was on!
This was not, in any way possible, intended to be “romantic”. He is my best friend’s boyfriend. Not to mention, I will never ever ever like him in that way. Literally never. He is just annoying pest that I am dealing with because I love my best friend. If it weren’t for her practically being in love with him, I would have gladly gotten rid of him. I would say “it” but that would just insult him even further. I’m being nice for once. I know. Shocker right?
Blake King, of course, had to open the door right when I got all in his face practically yelling at him to listen to logic and admit that he is wrong. Not was, is. Because he is wrong. No doubt about it. Now, Mr. Smirking-Annoying-Jerk-Face is acting like I was having an affair with my best friend’s boyfriend.
That’s disgusting. I’m involuntarily shivering just at thought of it. However, it doesn’t help that I’m over reacting to what he is insinuating. That, my friend, is my very own fault. Yes, I know. I actually admitted that I’m at fault for once in my life. Surprised? Me too.
Taking a deep breath in to calm my racing heart, “Fine. Don’t shut up.” Looking startled, “What?” Giving a small smile, a.k.a. my evil grin in disguise, “Don’t shut up. It’s all good. Ba-bye.” Frowning, oh what a beautiful frown, “Why are you leaving?” Chuckling, “Unless you’re buying me lunch, I have no reason to talk to you.” I’m totally not being serious about the lunch thing. But he doesn’t know that. “Okay? What do you want for lunch?” At that, I literally throw my head back in laughter. I’m laughing so hard that my eyes are tearing up, my face is just about as red as the Devil, and I’m having a hard time breathing. Oh, make that talking too. Sputtering, “Wha-what?” Looking really confused, “I thought you wanted lunch?” I laugh even harder at that. So hard in fact that I pass out. Figures.
You know those movies where the main character wakes up in some sort of hospital and everything seems muffled and blurry? Well, that’s exactly how it goes. Wholly crap! Those lights are freggin’ bright! As I’m still getting used to the freakishly bright lights, “Amelia?” I still can’t see and yet I already know it’s Blake. I have a slight idea to scare him more than I already have. Should I do it? Yes, I absolutely should. Cue the evil Cheshire cat grin. Okay, Amelia. Time to put your acting skills to test. Lights, cameras, action!
“Um, who’s there?” Speaking softly, “It’s me, Amelia. It’s Blake.” “Who’s Amelia? Where am I? And why the HECK can’t I see for the love of my lord Jesus Christ and Savior?” Now being able to see past the blindingly bright lights, I can clearly see Blake’s panicked expression. I’m gonna try not to laugh. Oh my goodness it’s so hard! Help! “Y-you don’t remember who you are?” Oh-my-goodness, I’m actually scaring him. I’m starting to feel guilty… If I don’t stop now he’s gonna hate me even more if I keep going with the facade. Should I give in? Nope. But I’m going to anyways. Cue the dramatic sighs and head-shaking. “Blake, hey. How ya doin’?” His expression is absolutely priceless. It’s a mixture of confusion and ludicrousy. “But you just said- I thought- what?” Grinning like an idiot, “Having trouble speaking are we?” Once again, his expression of down-right confusion is priceless.
I think I deserve an Oscar. Anyone willing to nominate the queen? No? Gah! Peasants don’t know royalty when in the presence of such a legend! “Blake King. Snap out of it.” “Are you sure you don’t remember who you are?” Sighing, “Blake. My name is Amelia Reighton. You stole my chair. I outrun you. Oh, and you really get on my nerves.” Realization finally dawning on his face, not two seconds later, it switched from confusion, to frustration, and then anger. Maybe I should have just pretended to have amnesia. In a dangerously low tone, “Amelia Reighton. Do you have any idea how serious of a joke you just pulled?”
Okay. I know I should be scared. He is down-right angry. But, honestly? I find it funny. Is that bad? Probably. Am I in some deep trouble? Yes, yes I am. Do I actually care? Not a drop. I’ve barely known Blake. I’ve only met him... I wanna say just today? And yet the death glare he is shooting my way doesn’t scare me at all. Any other person being targeted with that same glare would be 10 feet under. And yet, here I am. Lying in nothing but a hospital gown. No bra and no underwear. Maybe I should joke about that. It’ll ease the tension? I don’t know. But we are about to find out. “Yes, and I’m also in just a hospital gown. No bra, no underwear, and… yeah. I would say no humor but that would be a lie.”
You should see his face right now. His cheeks are flushed with embarrassment and he isn’t making eye contact with me whatsoever. In fact, he is looking everywhere but at me. Aw, he’s so cute when he’s flustered! Okay, I did not just think that. “Uh, I’m just gonna get the doctor? Yeah, I’m gonna get the doctor.” Dramatically gasping, “Is the Blake King embarrassed? I feel so accomplished! I have reached my final goal in life! We should throw a party!” Pouting, “Can you at least try not to relish in my downfall?” “Nope. It’s too good not to relish in it.” Muttering, “Figures.”
Walking outside the door, Blake doesn’t see someone running and that same someone knocks into Blake causing him to hit his head really hard. Blake goes out like a light. On the bright side, it was a criminal trying to escape. The downside? Blake is now in the room next to me. The other downside? I still didn’t get lunch. Figures.